What’s a Nice Jewish Boy Like You Doing in the Military?
Ask any Jew serving in the military if they’ve ever heard the question, “what’s a nice Jewish boy (or girl) like you doing in the military?”, and he or she is likely to roll their eyes and answer with a resounding “yes.” Most of us just smile and answer politely, but there is more to this question than a mild attempt at humor. While the intent might be good-natured, it wrongly assumes several things about Jewish military service.
As a Jewish Marine, I’m here to set the record straight – to point out that these assumptions are not only incorrect, but actually serve to perpetuate a negative perception of Jews in the military and Jews in general.
Assumption #1: Jewish service in the military is a rarity.
“What’s a nice Jewish boy like you doing in the military?”
Actually, Jews have a proud history of military service. We have served on the front lines from the founding of our country to the mountains of Afghanistan. Time and again anti-Semites have tried to paint the American Jew as a coward or as incapable of patriotism. Part of this mischaracterization has taken the form of discounting our military service. Over the years, the JWB and other organizations have worked tirelessly to gather and publish facts to counter the hateful rhetoric spewed by those determined to tarnish our record.
At my own synagogue, we have an annual veterans dinner to honor those in our congregation who have served. Early on in the ceremony, the host asks veterans of various conflicts to stand and be recognized. Now I know I live in a military town, but the vast majority of our congregants stand – from WWII sailors, to Vietnam platoon sergeants, to Desert Storm nurses. Think about it, is there anyone out there who doesn’t have a Jewish relative who served in WWII? I bet no one asked them why a “nice Jewish boy” decided to join up.
Assumption #2: Jews are not suited for military service.
“What’s a nice Jewish boy like you doing in the military?”
While the stereotype of the weak and feeble “Woody Allen” Jew makes for good comedy (hey, I love Jon Stewart too) it’s an old and inaccurate portrayal of our people. One that is most likely perpetuated by the same people who have always planted seeds of hate for the Jews. The long list of accomplished Jewish athletes, some of which won gold in these past Olympic Games, are just one example of our physical strength. However, I’d rather put forth one, far clearer, example: Israel.
The Israeli Defense Force’s combat history is one full of bravery and heroism proved time and again in combat. Not only are they respected in the region, but in our own country as well. A quick survey of my Marine peers on their views of the IDF elicit responses like, “those dudes are bad-ass”, “don’t f*ck with the IDF”, or “those guys don’t mess around.” The national armed service of the Jewish state is one of the most feared in the world. So why on earth would we draw the conclusion that Jews elsewhere are incapable of fierce combat and the challenges of war? There are a long list of Jewish Medal of Honor winners that would beg to differ.
Sadly, the image that comes to mind at the mention of the word “Jew” is often one of a frail scholar crouched over a book instead of a soldier perched on top of a tank. I’m not trying to paint us as a fundamentally militaristic tribe, but just as Rabbi Hillel is a key part of our history, so is Judah Maccabee. Our prowess on the battlefield is at least as responsible for our survival as our ability to keep Shabbat.
Assumption #3: Military service is not a distinguished profession.
“What’s a nice Jewish boy like you doing in the military?”
The idea that the only suitable occupation for a “nice Jewish boy” is that of a lawyer, doctor, or banker is one whose time has passed. Jewish mamalas everywhere need to let this one go, once and for all. A little bit of apprehension to your son or daughter seeking a profession that might put them in harm’s way is natural. However, that apprehension shouldn’t come from the premise that they won’t be “successful”.
Take General Norman Schwartz – the previous Chief of Staff of the Air Force. This is a man who commanded the most powerful Air Force in the world during a time of war, and worked directly with the President and other high officials in the government to make lasting and important policy for our armed forces and our country. Do you think his mom wished he had forgotten “that silly Air Force mess” and just went to medical school? Even if you don’t have aspirations to serve in the elite top ranks of your service, there are countless examples of Jews in uniform who have used their military service as a springboard into successful political and professional careers. The implication that military service is an inferior career choice is an insult to all of us in uniform – Jew or gentile.
Some may see this as an over-analyzation of an innocent and friendly question, but I’d simply ask that you consider the question from another perspective. We are thrilled to tell you what motivated us to serve our country, but the manner in which you ask the question is important. If you wouldn’t ask a woman what a nice girl like her is doing in the military, or why a hispanic person would become a pilot, then it only makes sense to refrain from asking “why a nice Jewish boy” would join the military.
So the next time you run into a Jewish servicemember, spare us the shock and dismay at our career choice. Just smile and thank us for our service. Or better yet, ask about all the cool stuff we do like landing on aircraft carriers, driving submarines, or jumping out of planes. We’d be happy to tell you all about it.
Capt Rubin, Thanks for discussing this issue. I spent 31 years in the Marine Corps and personally was never asked that question – maybe I don’t look too “nice”, and maybe I have no resemblance to Woody Allen. When I grew up in the 1950s and 60s, not too long after WW II, almost EVERY Jewish man (and many women) I met during that time frame, had served in the US Military (including my father, my mother, my brother, and all of my uncles and extended family, of whom there were many). Those Jewish men who hadn’t served during the WW II era were few and far between, and seemed to be ashamed of themselves, feeling compelled to explain what kind of medical condition kept them out of service, and how they tried to get a waiver to join. Maybe now-a-days some people have forgotten about WW II and the holocaust, how close we came to all being dead, and how anyone who thinks it “can’t happen here” is a moron. But you’re right, even now, when you scratch the surface, almost all Jewish people in America, have an immediate relative who has served or is a veteran themselves. I go to Shul now at a Chabad which is not too close to any major bases, and yet almost EVERYONE in the congregation has themselves served, has an immediate family member who has served, or is actually serving right now! In fact in our congregation we have 5 active duty (some of whom are young servicemen who join us at Shul when they’re home on leave visiting their family), 7 retired military, and numerous Veterans of all branches of the service, ranging from the WW II era to the current time. I think that if any Jewish person has such a narrow view of themselves and or of their community that they would make such an ignorant statement is simply out of touch with reality or doesn’t realize who is sitting next to them in Shul (many people have no idea, and never ask, about the military background, sometimes quite extensive, of the person sitting next to them). Thanks again for writing such a thought provoking article. G-d bless you and thank you for your service. Semper Fi, Samson
I was born in South Africa and grew up in Israel. My South African born father was an Artillery Captain in the South African army and served in North Africa during WWII. He missed being captured when Tobruk fell as he was on leave in Palestine. Many of his comrades were Jewish. During Israel’s War of Independence, he brought a group of volunteers , under dangerous conditions, to fight in the war. He was one of the founders of Israel’s School of Artillery. When we made Aliyah to Israel, he was too old for military service but served the IDF in other ways during the 1956 Sinai Campaign.
My two brothers, sister and I served in the IDF. My one brother was in the Armoured Corps and fought in the Six Day War under Arik Sharon. He was wounded riding in a jeep convoy in the Gaza Strip, headed towards Egypt. My other brother was a paratrooper and both were marksmen. During basic training, I learned, among other things, to shoot an Uzi, a Czech rifle and throw hand grenades. I am female, by the way. I remember that when I was in high school, I couldn’t wait till I was eligible to serve.
Both my brothers served as reservists, which is compulsory for men until the age of 49. Depending on their unit, they can be required to serve at least one month a year.
We Israelis are very proud of the IDF. we wish we didn’t need to have such a strong military but it is vital to our very survival.
In israel, as in this country, many useful inventions in civilian life have stemmed from military life.
By the way, while the IDF is comprised overwhelmingly of Jewish Israelis, Israeli Druze and Arabs also serve.
Whether it’s in Israel, South Africa, or the U.S., Jews have had a proud and distinguished history as soldiers – smart and brave – going all the way back to Biblical times!
I remember Rosh Hashonah at Nha Trang in 1968-just for II Corps and there had to be about 500 or more Jewish servicemen there at the “retreat”.In WW2 almost everyone in my family served and there were three of us that went to Vietnam.None in Korea that I know of-no one the right age-and quite a few between Korea and Vietnam.That stereotype question is too often asked by ignorant Jewish people today-I can’t understand why any of my tribe members would self deprecate that way or act patronizing-today’s young Jewish population in America is not generally encouraged to join the military unfortunately.The Jews in the military are out of sight,out of mind.The ones that are always in the media are not people I want to associate with..Al Franken,the misguided Senator from MN,who is Jewish,once joked that the highest ranking Jew in the military was the “comptroller of the Coast Guard”-when in fact the Assistant Commandant of the USMC was Jewish.Franken perpetuaated the rancis stereotype against his own people.Disgusting…
More than a half million Jews served in the US military during WWII. I’m a veteran of seven years Army and Air Force active duty in the 60’s and 70’s.
I know its late, But thanks Devil Dog, for an article that tells it like it is. I have been asked the “question” many times. I have also said, “I Guess I’m not a Woody Allen Jew” on several occasions as well. 28 years USMC, USN, Army Guard, & Air Force, Helo Pilot, OEF and OIF…loved it, wish I could do it again. We DO make great Doctors, Lawyers, Bankers, etc. but we also make great WARRIORS!
Thank you Capt. Rubin for eloquently answering the stereotypical questions you noted. I think there is a difficult question which remains unanswered: how will an observant Jew who keeps kosher and Shabbat, etc. manage in a large military machine which has an entirely different orientation?
I am an IDF veteran. I understand well the exigencies of military life. We managed well as observant Jews because the IDF has certain standards and accommodations built into its basic culture. But how will an observant Jew in the US military keep commandments like Shabbat, especially during basic training or maneuvers? S/he can’t exactly tell the senior NCO ‘I’ll catch up with you tomorrow”. Can we really expect a combat soldier who keeps kosher to get by an entire career with second-rate food while his comrades eat fresh cooked? The list, it seems, goes on. It seems to me that the logistical difficulties, never mind the religiocultural ones, present a real problem for a fully observant Jew. How would a young Modern Orthodox yeshiva graduate consider such a move seriously without knowing how to manage the challenges? I think that angle is not well enough explored and articulated. Or is the answer simply that there really isn’t a path, at least not in combat units, for such a Jew?
Hag Pesah Sameah. Keep up the good work here, and God bless you with strength and success in your service and defense of civil society for all.
Valid point. Shabbat is an issue. It’s almost impossible to be shomer Shabbas in the military (unless you’re a Chaplin). However, if you’re willing to sacrifice for G-d and country, then you’re willing to sacrifice your day of delight. It’s not ideal but we don’t live in an ideal world. Most service members could observantly observe 30-35 Shabbats a year when in garrison.
I think you’re entirely right – as long as Shabbat is only a “day of delight”. But the halachic notion of Shabbat is a time of *obligation* first and foremost. There are mandatory restraints and obligations regarding Shabbat, and to the believing, observant Jew they aren’t open to negotiation (outside situations of clear and present or immanent danger). That seems to me, an outsider, a near-insurmountable obstacle. Even in garrison, how does a soldier explain to his senior NCO that he is forbidden to shave or shine his boots on Shabbat? I doubt there is enough flexibility in the American military to accommodate complete fealty to a Divine Torah and halachah.
You’re ‘sacrifice for God and country’ is a nice philosophical notion; but it has no weight in halachah and can’t countermand the God-commanded obligations. And of course, a believing Jew isn’t concerned only with keeping Shabbat. S/he has a broad range of defining commandments that influence pretty much the entire course of a day, and a life. *Some* of those obligations and needs have workarounds; but I can’t help but see a clash of cultures here. Do we have to say that an observant Jew simply has to forget about being a Ranger, etc? It seems so at first glance.
I would point to the Jews who serve in the IDF. While their command is far more familiar with halachic obligations, they still have to patrol on Shabbat and Yamim Tovim. While service might be obligatory in Israel, would you say that anyone who serves past their initial commitment is not a “believing Jew”?
I know of several Orthodox Jews in the military who manage just fine. Is life a bit harder for them? Do they have to go out of their way to be fully observant? Sure. However, none of the ones I met regretted their decision to serve. You might be surprised at how flexible the military can be in this regard if a chaplain is brought into the picture.
Judaism is *full* of workarounds for various activities. A barely visible wire, strung in the right way lets you carry on Shabbos. A siyum on the morning before Passover lets you avoid fasting. If we accept those completely and without question, then it shouldn’t be so outrageous for exceptions to service that protects the lives of others (assuming a competent authority rules on the matter). I’m no rabbi, so I certainly won’t argue halacha with one, but we have Jewish chaplains (some Orthodox) who deal with these issues all the time and can make appropriate, informed decisions.
You are right that there is a clash of cultures. A Torah-obsevant Jew is going to struggle to adjust to military life, not unlike every civilian does. That doesn’t mean that he or she can’t carve out their own place that keeps them true to their obligations. There are career choices that will affect their ability to do that though. The vast majority of military jobs (while in garrison) are ones with standard 5-day work weeks. Combat and deployments are another story, but that’s where Pikuach Nefesh plays a bigger role.
With all of that said, it’s not a life for everyone. Just like there are non-Jews who are ill-fitted to military life, there will be many Jews who can’t (or won’t) make it work. I’m not trying to say that we should *all* drop what we are doing and join the military. My point is that we Jews have a proud tradition of service and to deny that, or imply that those who do choose to serve are making a bizarre and unprecedented decision, is offensive.
Thank you for your excellent reply. Relating to just one point, that IDF soldiers too have to patrol, etc. on Shabbat or holydays. IDF regulations are written such that only actual operational duties are required on Shabbat or holydays and fast days. This the halacha allows in the general scheme of pikuah nefesh (saving a life). Training or delayable maintenance are banned at those times. That alone makes life so very much easier for the observant soldier. I spent many Shabbatot and holydays in the field during my 9 years, including over the border on operations. But knowing that no one could expect me to be at the range or on a march made a world of difference. Similarly, all food is required to be kosher. That means that no matter my personal preferences or strictures, I knew that whatever was supplied was basically kosher. Again, that removed many worries. Of course, we had to make do and compromise with our non-observant colleagues (the majority); but we didn’t have to fight for the most basic halachic issues and that made our service much more manageable.
Personally, I see service in the US military as potentially an act of real gratitude and loyalty to a country that has sheltered so many Jewish families. Moreover, it is service to greater civil society. But when a young man says, ‘so how will I manage when we are ordered into the field or for a practice jump on Shabbat?’, personally I wouldn’t know what to say. Barring present or immanent danger, is a Jew allowed to put himself ab inition in a position that will require violation of halacha, because he wants to to do a noble deed?
I have only the highest regard for the men and women in the US military. I am grateful to them for their great service to civil society worldwide. I’m just trying to learn (mostly for theoretical interest) how does an observant Jew first approach this noble endeavor?
I thank you for maintaining this site. It is certainly of practical benefit; but also an education for those of us who care to learn.
Rabbi Scher. I appreciate the conversation. Perhaps you would find better answers to your specific questions from a frum service member.
While I consider myself observant, I have come to accept the various compromises I have had to make. I also was not at all observant when I first enlisted, so I come at it from a different perspective in that respect too.
To be honest, I am far more forgiving in criticism from the Orthodox about Jewish military service as these critiques would be equally relevant about any occupation that interferes with full halachic observance (to include the ability to live in a frum community). I cede *most* of those points in that respect.
However, the “what’s a nice Jewish boy like you…” comments do not come from those folks. The commenters are more driven by preconceptions than real halachic concerns. That’s who my points above apply to the most.
Just noticed your earlier reply here too. I wanted to address the kosher issue here. Second rate rations in the field is a reality. To be fair, the first rate ones ain’t that great either… With that said, unless I was on deployment, I eat delicious kosher food that my wife prepares for me. We have to drive 3-hours to get kosher meat once a month, but to me it is worth the sacrifice.
Again, I’ll point out that the intent of the article isn’t to say that military service is for everyone, just that it is not so outrageous for a Jew (of any walk of life) to choose.
My comment wasn’t really about the quality of the food. I ate many scanty, hasty meals where the major spice was sand. My intention was that with all the discomforts of being a field soldier, it is even harder if an observant Jew on extended field ops or exercises is eating even *worse* than his colleagues because kosher food isn’t normally available in the supply chain. Yet, I would feel funny advising a young man or woman, ‘sure, go serve. It is a noble thing. But stay away from field units or assignments to better ensure that you can keep the commandments.’ That just doesn’t sound right to my ears; but is it the approach needed for a Jew who wants to be observant and serve in the US military?
I am a Modern Orthodox Jew who is seriously considering military service in the US Army. I am college educated, patriotic, and feel I can make a difference. I don’t want to be a chaplain; I want to be a Ranger. Mordechai Y. Scher, ideological motivations for choosing the US military aside, your arguments for exploration resonate with me as I must consider how I would keep Shabbat and Kosher. These are things I need to keep and would sacrifice for. I don’t want to sacrifice military service because I don’t have the answers to this issue, but at the same time I feel I must keep these basic tenets of Judaism not only out of religious obligation but also to maintain personal integrity. The easy answer, as you said, is to just not serve. This is unacceptable to me.
I have heard that you can request Saturdays off in Basic Training but you would have to make them up and stay longer. Friday nights also need to be considered. Kosher food is a major issue, but can you not get around it by drinking milk and eating raw vegetables, supplemented with a multi-vitamin? Perhaps the Jewish community, through sites such as KosherTroops.com, can help accommodate an observant Jewish soldier’s dietary restrictions and provide nutritious kosher food. It’s certainly not an ideal situation and would no-doubt leave a person wanting, but these are necessary sacrifices that I would not think twice about and would be fully committed to.
Of course, if I don’t even have the option to make these sacrifices, then military services would become a significantly less-plausible outcome. However, most observant Jews do not consider US military service an option, leaving a path that may be teeming with possibilities, unexplored. I suggest we all make a conscious effort to explore any and all possibilities. We owe it to the United States and to ourselves.
I am a nice Jewish boy and retired with 28 years service to this great nation. That service includes two combat deployments to Iraq. Remember Always, G-d Save Our Army and G-d Bless America.
I really appreciate the foregoing, thoughtful input. My father began his military service before WWII. I am saddened that he changed his name so that the bigotry against Jews didn’t follow him. And, my mother was not Jewish, complicating the issue. I am so glad there are and were men and women of my (Jewish) faith who stood proud.
Thank you so much for opening this conversation. When my son first joined, friends and family would ask what I had done wrong as a mother, mostly amongst themselves, but glaringly loud nonetheless. It came to a point that I would not let people know about my son’s service. I came to recognize how wrong they were. My son is the one they should emulate. He is proud, ethical, and a true role model. Yes there have been circumstances where he has been the only Jew, but he has turned that into teaching moments (on his own). I look at him with pride and know I did something right – and the true shame is that there is such a small number of Jews in the US military.